He Really Loves

I apologize for the tardiness of my post, but I am going to double whammy it tonight and pair up for the last two sermons.

This week I had a lecture on how to interact with others facing grief and loss. At one point, my professor mentioned John 11: Jesus comes to see Lazarus, who has just died. The Scriptures read, "When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. And he said, 'Where have you laid him?' They said to him, 'Lord, come and see.' Jesus wept. So the Jews said, 'See how he loved him!" (John 11:33-36). When he saw their pain, he could have fixed it; he could have raised Lazarus and ended their mourning. But instead, he chooses to enter into their grief and mourn with them. He weeps. He is not just near, he is with us in any and every circumstance. He is with us in our emotions; he understands; he chooses to listen; he chooses to care; he chooses to know us; he chooses us. It is in his nearness that he makes his presence known by wanting his people to feel heard and close to him more than wanting to make the circumstances better.

So often I don't know how to respond to the truth that Jesus is near. I cannot grasp the proximity of nearness; it seems like an intangible distance, an ambiguous measurement. How can I possibly experience the Lord's comfort, yet not be able to explain of define what nearness means? I am still wrestling with what that looks like, but, as David says, I know that his rod and staff comfort me. I know that you are my Shepherd, Lord. I know and believe who you say you are. I see you in this world you created and in the people you made in your image. I know you by how you manifest yourself in all that is good, acceptable, worthy, honorable, peaceable. Physical indication affirm who I know you to be and they bring me comfort, contentment, because I can attach myself then to belonging to you.

Abba, help me respond to your nearness. That in your nearness, I need not shy away, nor hide what is repulsive. For it is in my poverty that you chose to come to me. In my sin, you know me fully and really do love me. I am consistently amazed by how you love. Thank you for giving us you, a gift you never intended to be repaid for and continue to give of yourself more and more. 

The process of Attachment

Hey Admin, first let me say, thank you for the wonderful journey of preparation these past few weeks via the Blog.  I really believe that we (Admin) experienced DJ's first "secret" this past weekend.  "ATTACHMENT TO THE LARGER NARRATIVE!!"  As I debriefed the Barnabas training weekend, I can honestly say that it looked, felt, and sounded different than those of the past.  I believe that my (our) attachment to the Land Called Gospel has changed my (our) world view in such a way that material that is second nature for me (training weekends), took on a whole new life!  Material that has been "attached" to Sonshine Ministries and the Land Called Houseboats, leaped of the page with new life in light of it's attachment to the greater narrative.

In the land Called Gospel, the weekend began with, "There is a Lion outside; I shall be slain in the streets!"

In the Land Called Gospel, the weekend was held together with, "If it doesn't break your heart it isn't Love, if it doesn't break your heart it's not enough, It's when your breaking down, when your insides are coming out, that's when you find out what your heart is made of!"

In the Land Called Gospel, the weekend ended with attachment to the greater narrative, "LOYALTY / COMMITMENT TO CHRIST - When you admit that faith in God through Jesus Christ is the most precious valuable gift you’ve been given, you embrace the erosion of external attributes for you understand that erosion exposes the source of your faith (Or what Land you citizenize).  When what is seen is wasted away, only what is unseen remains (The true land of the Gospel).  How and when God will expose the source of your faith is life’s most suspenseful and necessary mystery?  When the testing moments come, His shaking reveals the unshakable.  His fire exposes the unquenchable.  His cross beckons us at our core to shatter all trust in what is seen and to confess, “To live is Christ and to die is gain.”  Walking through Calvary with Jesus anchors your identity and strength in Him.  Through Calvary, your credibility and confidence expresses Christ’s divine royalty.  Frustrations, condescension, body aches, broken hearts, and disappointment become light and momentary as they are consumed by His eternal glory.  Christ is eager to build into you His eternal rewards.  Your life’s journey is a constant work on Christ’s part to help you identify the source of your faith and direct it to Him (And to stamp your passport (cross) into the Land called Gospel). 

I look forward to this weekend to see, feel, and hear afresh the Lands national anthem played out through the lives of it's citizens.  If you have forgotten the words, let me remind you....

PHILIPPIANS 2:1-11
Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? Any fellowship together in the Spirit? Are your hearts tender and sympathetic? Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one heart and purpose. Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. Don't think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing. Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not demand and cling to his rights as God. He made himself nothing; he took the humble position of a slave and appeared in human form. And in human form he obediently humbled himself even further by dying a criminal's death on a cross. Because of this, God raised him up to the heights of heaven and gave him a name that is above every other name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

 
     

Restless Hearts

When Darrell teaches his second point, “Attach yourself to the larger narrative of life.  Attach yourself to Jesus and His Gospel of the Kingdom,” he goes on to state that Paul learned to see his story in light of Jesus’ story -- the story in which Jesus wins.  I couldn’t help but think, “Testimonies...where our story meets God’s story!!”  During the Barney training weekend, we went around the room and shared our “I AM” statement testimonies, and witness after witness shared their story in which Jesus wins. 

Darrell also goes on to say that Paul’s life has meaning and purpose.  We can stop fretting about the meaning of our lives because Christ is the meaning of our lives.  This ties in directly with Staff Culture Point #9 – Passion.  “Our deepest longing is meaning.  What is the meaning that drives your life?  Without meaning your initiative implodes.”  Dear Lord, may the driving force behind all we do, all we say, and all of our life goals be you.  May You be our life goal. #lifegoals

The prayer said at the end of the sermon sums up my feelings, prayers, and cries throughout this sermon series: "Our hearts are restless until they find their rest in You.  You have made us for yourself and our hearts are restless until they find their rest in You.  We invite You to do whatever form of heart surgery is required that we might be able to say in any and every circumstance 'I am satisfied in You.'  You are good, all the time, and you are enough.”

grace on grace on grace

This sermon was great timing. I realized holy smokes… Barney Training weekend is happening this weekend and Driver Weekend is the next. Summer is coming!! I had a few thoughts this week of “wow not sure I am ready for all of this!” Honestly not sure I’ll ever feel ready for all of this but I found so much peace and truth in this week’s message. I can do all things Christ calls me to do because Christ will give me the strength to do the things he calls me to do!!! And when it’s time, the Lord will give me “Directing grace” - just like he’s given all of us the grace and strength for each summer on the water. I want my response to God’s call to be -  YES! I trust you! Because I know it’s not my ability but your ability! The Lord’s strength is sufficient. He promises to supply every need…. And surprise! Our greatest need is Himself - and he will give us as much of himself as we need. Thank you Lord!

My prayer for us is that the Lord will continue to teach us contentment and that each moment of our days would have meaning because they are attached to the gospel of Christ.

"Wheeeee!" – The onomatopoetic ecstatic utterance to express the verb FREELY and the Whimsical Disposition of the Happily Crucified!

DJ went into what he calls a rather “complex” explanation of his 2^nd of four “Secrets of Contenment.”  In his explanation he discusses cultural conventions affecting the understanding of giving and receiving gifts among friends.  

Ultimately, DJ shares that he believes Paul understood giving as emanating from the mind of Christ. To explain the mind of Christ DJ proclaims that Jesus did not give to attain status or to establish a cycle of reciprocity or obligation or to achieve status. Instead, DJ asserts that Jesus, our friend, empties himself (key word here) FREELY (wheeeee! – Steve’s onomatopoetic ecstatic utterance to express the verb FREELY--!!!!) So Jesus, per DJ, empties himself freely. He roots Chrst’s freely self-emtpying in the “eternal self giving of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.”


 (BACK TO MY OLD WAYS - going to tie this point to training materials/devo stuff) When listening to the message and particularly DJ’s 2nd Secret of Contentment, the following writing on Modesty from our Devo came to mind.

From the Devo! --  I am amazed with how Christ's decision to (FREELY) "make Himself nothing" unleashed the power to transform all creation (Revelation 21:1-5.) He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter - Isaiah 53:7. Christ, the lamb, was silenced horrifically at the cross and yet all things in the earth and under the earth and in the sea shouts and sings, “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be praise and honor and glory and power, forever and ever!" He redefines the enemy's most devastating emptiness (Christ's death) with meaning. Tragic discord with harmony. Death with life. Silence with praise. Encountering Christ's selflessness and humility compels me to drop to my knees, bow my head in wonder, and declare -- THAT'S MY LORD! MY GOD!" He's so, so good. Thank you Jesus for exhibiting such purity of power in your loving pursuit of us. Push us to trust you when we are given the opportunity to lay down our lives for others like you did. In all moments but perhaps especially moments of sacrifice, may our hearts sing with hope and joy, "it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me." Thank you Jesus for planting the tree of your cross directly in our path today. Thank you Jesus for drinking the bitter cup and taking on our sin and bearing hell for us and the world. To think of what you suffered as the one with all authority and power breaks my heart and pride in such a good and necessary way. To think that you now politely and delicately knock at the door of our hearts and invite us to share your banquet of grace with you and others completely blows my mind and soul to a place of worship and trust. Thank you God for revealing Love by being crushed for our sin. Now, please cast out our fear so for a fleeting moment we would surrender to you our pride, sin, shame, & control. We hold up these destructive powers to you. Take them Lord. Crush them Jesus. Cut them away with your sword of fire such that we are nothing other than a deflated, defeated, broken heap of dependence upon You and Your Kingdom come here and now. Please keep knocking at the stubborn door of our hearts. Please keep knocking and please come in and by the work of your spirit make me and all of us one as you and the father are one. Bring our lives to life by your body broken and blood shed. May the light in our eyes and life in our lives be from deep communion with your death and exultant resurrection. Amen!

Looking forward to being one of the happily crucified with you this weekend as we seek to take a genuine interest in the welfare of the Barneys and take up crosses daily to follow Christ's lead in the “eternal self giving of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.”

Things Are Not As They Seem!!!

I'm going through Discipleship on the Edge with two of my small group girls right now and during this sermon, I couldn't help but think of the main indicative/affirmation/declaration of the book of Revelation: things are not as they seem.

The indicative/affirmation makes it possible to obey the imperative/exhortation. It answers the huge "Why?" I find myself asking as I read through scripture. Why seek wisdom over gold? Why work for reconciliation? Why tame my tongue? Because things are not as they seem. There is so much more to your everyday interactions than what is visible to the unaided senses.

Things are not as they seem, because Jesus is near....so very near, and we are numb to the unseen realities of the present. This affirmation leaves no room for worry about the future, no room for self-consciousness and frees us to live out the exhortations. Or rather, enables us to live out the exhortation because Being Follows Doing.

Cannot wait for summer!!

Unfabricated Peace

In order to experience a peace that surpasses our understanding, we must recognize that the Lord is near. It is when we feel that we're alone, that we become anxious. When we deny the nearness of Jesus, we deny the unfabricated peace of the one who is peace.

I love what DJ said, "why pray when you can worry?" This is obvious. This is almost an insulting statement (insulting because that's what I end up saying). Obviously I don't want to worry. Yet, I still do. I have heard the solution. I have read it. I have studied it. But I still worry. I still feel anxious. I know that the the only way to rid myself of anxiety is to recognize the nearness of Jesus and to pray, but WHY DO I STILL WORRY? Honestly, it's frustrating that I know the answer, I know how to stop the stress, but I so often would rather live in worry. I would rather drain the energy by worrying, than be overwhelmingly full of the love, joy, and peace of Christ.

This weeks sermon reminded me that when I'm stressed, when I'm worried, I need to recognize the true nearness of Jesus in that moment. So simple, yet I continuously make it so complicated. Paul, while sitting in a jail cell, is able to talk about peace because he recognized the nearness of Jesus despite his circumstances. If Paul can experience this radical peace in the midst of circumstances that would seem appropriate for extreme stress, then I can do the same within my seemingly stressful circumstances.

Jesus, would you overwhelm me with your peace in a way that I can not deny your nearness. Allow me to recognize that in EVERY aspect of life, you are near. Thank you for your overwhelming love, joy, and peace. Thank you that you are truly near, so very near. 

What am I afraid of?

He is near... so very near.  Lord, we pray in your mercy and grace that you would help us actually live the reality these words point to.

This week the fifth implication stood out to me most: Because the Lord is near, in both space and time, it is possible to think clearly, cleanly.
Again and again DJ expresses who Jesus is.  He is Truth.  He is Noble.  Right.  Pure.  Just.  He is Joy.
I understand Miriam here as I think about how embarrassed/ ashamed I am.  I am not these things.  Nor do I always trust in the one who IS.  My pray this day/ weekend is that God would take my mind and fix it on Himself.  I can clearly hear the passion and the gritted teeth when DJ spits the word "fix".  I feel that resistance.  Lord please overcome that resistance.

A second note from this week's message: DJ helped me realize that during the amount of times I have read these verses before I seem to have always jumped over the second part of verse five, "The Lord is near."  While so many other parts were underlined, circled, with notes in the margins, it made it difficult to even see and read that Truth, "The Lord is near."
I am so quick to circle all the things "I need to do," I am plagued by the important versus the urgent (I can honestly never remember which is which though), I want to be able to figure out just how much I need to do.
Lord, would you transform my mind to read that indicative first.  May I remember that it is out of the love of You, and the knowledge and understanding of You, that all else flows.

Finally, what am I afraid of?  Control, not having that monopoly over truth (thanks again Mirm)...
I think the fact that I want to erase through this all suggests that I am offended.  I pray lastly that we all may cast our cares, anxieties, thoughts, hopes and fears on the one who knows them all, and defiantly loves us nevertheless.

The Space between......(Cue Dave Matthews)

The Delgado family is in Phoenix AZ this weekend for a hockey tournament- (Owen and Elle are both playing). Listening to this sermon a few times (12 hour drive) has kept me from saying many stupid things out of anger to a bunch of 9-10 year old kids WHILE coaching them.  Last year I wrote my post from a hotel room and this year I am in a hotel lobby.  Last year the Admin team studied John 17, "Listening to Jesus pray for us."  I went back and reread what I posted last year and was blown away!  I have been experiencing a dimension of "nearness" and "Defiant Joy" in the "space between" this past year that I was not aware until I read my post from last year.  God is near....so very near!

Post from 2/14/2016
The enemy's lie....."NO JOY FOR YOU!" "Evil's one goal is to doubt the goodness of God" - DJ

Back in the 90's NBC Thursday night TV ruled the ratings.  The most popular show was "Seinfeld" followed by "Friends."  A legendary episode of Seinfeld involved an iconic character named "The Soup Nazi!"  His one line, "No soup for you!"

"No soup for you" quickly became a cultural saying that implicitly robbed someone of a said desire or joy.

Enter Phoenix Arizona!  Owen and I have been in Arizona since Thursday night.  We are here with his hockey team from Stockton.  I am the assistant coach of the team so I get to deal with the parents in a "special" way.  Our family happens to be the only family on the team that has placed our hope in Jesus.  Throughout the season there has been many uncomfortable moments of tension between my family and others (most notably how we raise our kids).  Two world views colliding on the stage of youth hockey.  This weekend I have discovered afresh and been reminded by Darrell in this sermon,  that joy (the joy of Jesus) is offensive!  People who don't know the Grace of God are searching desperately for Joy the person!  When confronted by Joy, I have observed two different responses.
1.  Anger
2.  Wonder and intrigue

Even after a crushing 13-1 loss (last night), a smiling 9 year old (Owen) is offensive to parents who have believed the lie that the Father (God) is no good.  No grace.....No Joy!  The joy nazi (the enemy) strikes again!

I have been surrounded/reminded this weekend that bathing in God's grace exudes a pungent odor of Joy unspeakable!!!

End post from 2/14/2016

From a prison cell in Rome to a hotel lobby in Arizona (again) GOD IS NEAR....SO VERY NEAR!....And that nearness engages us in so many dimensions.  I am only aware of maybe 3 or 4 dimensions throughout the day of this nearness, but how many am I not aware of?  (This bugs me - kind of like Mirm trying to corner the market on truth =)

How many times has He drawn near through scripture or circumstance (prison cell - hockey families) that I either ignore or pray against.  How many times does He draw near during the summer to which I react in the same manner?   OUCH! Mother word softener!!!!!

God is near....so very near!

I am thankful for this blog and everyone's participation.  See most of you next weekend!!

SUMMER IS NEAR....SO VERY NEAR!!!

  

Great Intimacy meets Strong Resistance

Alright, I’m going to attempt to express both the great intimacy and strong resistance that I have been feeling in this past week at discovering new facets to the greatness of our God:

While thinking of this sermon for a couple of days, I’ve been trying to understand why I have had conflicting reactions to the one truth that Jesus is near. Here’s what I’ve come up with.

I want to have a monopoly on Truth. I want to have all the answers. And when I realize that I DO NOT have all the answers to so many questions, I am afraid; my spirit realizes that it is not up to the task. ‘What is this unknown? I thought I had it all figured out!’ This is the resistance.

But simultaneously there is a call to great intimacy. He prompts me to come to Him with my questions, to trust the foundation He has created for me. I am elated at this reminder of who I know God to be.

My God is Good, He is Joy and Light and Truth. He is Peace.

This floods over me in the moments when my spirit rebels against submission to His name. I find that I was fearful because I wasn’t trusting these things that I know to be true of my God. This peace that surpasses all understanding comes only from my God and is presented to still a restless and wandering soul.

I am embarrassed when I realize that I have doubted or forgotten that God is Truth and Righteousness, Purity, Loveliness, Goodness, Excellence and Worthiness Himself. But when I am reassured of these things, I am emboldened to explore, discover and jump into life and the Life! He calls me to embrace the unknown things of this world because He is near. Although I may find new things that I don’t understand, He is near.

Jesus calls us to these places all the time over the summer and he shows us the questions of his children at Wednesday/Thursday night program. My prayer is that the Spirit of God would guide our spirits and the spirits of the campers to see that Jesus is near in all things.

I want to go so many places with these thoughts, but I’ll end there for now.

Love you all,

Mirm 

In the Meantime

Because the Lord is near, both in space and time, it is possible to know real joy.  Darrell’s second point was where my focus fell during this week’s sermon. 

DJ reminds us that Paul, from a prison cell, exhorts that the Lord is near.  Johnson goes on to say, “Then why don’t you get me out of it?  A valid thing to ask the Lord to do.”  Then he says the next phrase which I could practically see written in bold,

“In the meantime, the Lord is near.”

Yes. In the meantime…. a place I feel I have been in for quite a while now.  I find myself living in the tension of trying to be and live in the present and seize what God has in the moment, but feeling like I am waiting for the next phase of my life to begin.  I am living in the meantime.  Paul reminds us that God is near, nay, He is here.  God is IN the meantime.  The One who is in the meantime is joy itself.  The One who is for me, is in the meantime.  The One who will not desert me, is in the meantime.   I loved Karl Barth’s quote, “Joy is a defiant nevertheless.”  Yes, it is. 

When I heard this phrase of “In the meantime, the Lord is near,” it reminded me of something I tell my students when they say, “I don’t know how to do this.”  I say, “You are right. You don’t know how to do this….yet.” But in the “yet” I will be with you, I will guide you, until you understand.  I think God does the same with us “in the meantime.”  In a prison cell, in a life limbo stage, in the mire, in grief, in the meantime…He is near. 

 Toward the end of the sermon, Darrell says, “Mary pondered all these things in her heart, which I think she does the rest of her life.”   You and me, sister. 

The five implications of shattering the dimension separator and living by the truth, in the truth, with the truth, and for the truth!

I was particularly drawn to DJ’s transition in the message when he says about Paul, “As he brings his letter to a conclusion.  He speaks final exhortations.  Which affect the way we live.”  

Since both our training and summer experience involve allowing Christ to affect the way we live (we have a section in the SUPULTPACK titled “STAFF BEHAVIOR!”) I was eager to hear DJ via Paul in Philippians give DJ’s biblical exhortationesque wisdom into STAFF BEHAVIOR via the section of the message he describes as FIVE IMPLICATIONS.

In this post I list the five implications and tie them to one particular culture point that I feel is a powerful paraphrase of the implications and the message.   

The five implications of shattering the dimension separator and living by the truth, in the truth, with the truth, and for the truth!

# 1- Because the Lord is near both in space and time it is possible to live in harmony.
#2 – Because the Lord is near both in space and time it is possible to know real joy.  The final quote for this point I found inspiring: JOY IS A DEFIANT NEVERTHELESS! – Carl Baarth.
# 3 – Because the Lord is near both in space and time it is possible to respond to difficulties with gentleness. 
#4 – Because the Lord is near both in space and time it is possible to live in peace.
# 5- Because the Lord is near in space and time it is possible to think clearly and cleanly.

One idea I had for each of these points is to tie them to staff behavior and culture points.....(not much of a surprise that I'd do that is it?  -- I do that every post.)   

Instead I decided to throw in culture point #10 to bookend this post.  So many themes from DJ’s message zing, zang, snap, crackle, pop in CP # 10.  Slap shot… here we go with CP #10…….

10.  COMMUNION WITH CHRIST (John 15:5) - “I am the vine, you are the branches.  He who abides in me, and I in him, it is he that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”  (Phil. 4:6) - “Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.”  Every moment of everyday God calls us to be His people.  He calls us to Himself.  A consistent, "Here am I Lord" is the aim of our walk.  Be diligent when meditating on the Word of God, reading, praying, fasting, listening for God's voice.  We highly recommend reading the book Celebration of the Disciplines by Richard Foster.  Seek out someone you can be discipled by and share life with.  Christ brings meaning to every situation.  Commune with Jesus.  Move from communion as His body and let the power and mystery of His spirit transform all circumstances into opportunities to see, hear, taste, touch, and feel His glorious appearing.  (Acts 1:8)

Thanks for your participation in the blog!  Seeing God’s world through your words/perspective is super ultra fun, mysterious, and uplifting!!

WHY? Because GOOD NEWS!

-Do not be anxious about anything.

-Present requests with gratitude.

-Think about things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise.

These are what you might call statements of “good advice”. And all of these questions can easily be followed with a big fat “WHY?” Why should I not be anxious about anything when there are plenty of things in the world to be anxious about? Why should I be grateful when I ask for things I need because clearly I don’t have enough to be grateful for? Why should I think about all of those things (true, honorable, just, etc.) when our culture is telling me to fill my head with thoughts and ideas that are quite the opposite?

Jesus is the ultimate “keeper of the why”. These statements are good advice BECAUSE of the good news!! And the piece of the good news that is the most important right here is that the Lord is near!!! Because the Lord is near (both in space and time), it is possible to live a life where we are not anxious about anything. It is possible to know real joy and respond with real gentleness. Because the Lord is near, presenting our requests with gratitude helps put our needs in perspective. When we think about things that are true/honorable/just/etc., we are really thinking about Jesus because Jesus is truth and honor and just and pure and lovely and commendable and excellent and worthy of praise.

Why worry when you can pray? Praying that we would simply dwell on Jesus when we find ourselves becoming anxious because the Lord is so very near.

I Want to Want

Warning:  Downer alert!   But keep reading, it gets better!

Perhaps I should title this week’s blog entry as “Epic Fails”.  As I listened to the this week’s Gospel message, it felt like every other sentence was a giant Jesus bomb going off in my face.  “Your polis shapes your longings and desires.”  BOOM!  “The meaning of one’s life determined…how one treated people.”  BOOM!  “Spread abroad heaven’s passions.”  BOOM!  “When our longing for Jesus is alive in us, all of our longings come in line and we no longer give into the pull of Rome.” BOOM!  Each statement cracked me open and sent me into a bit of a tail spin of how I epically fail on a daily basis in these ways.  Ugh!!  

But……the silver lining is….I want.  I remember reading a quote of St. Teresa of Avila: "Oh God… I want to want to love you!"  Oh God, I want to do these things, I want to be of this mindset, I want my longing for you to be alive in me, I want to cherish the challenging people in my life for they are yours!  All of these wants lead to me to yelling out, “Jesus, help me! I need you!”  I have found in these last two weeks that my “Help!” cries are getting louder and more frequent. Much like Ricky Bobby in Talladega Nights spinning around on the track thinking he is on fire crying, “Help me, Jesus! Help me, Tom Cruise, Help me, Oprah!”  I too, have been crying out, “Help me, Jesus!”  I have also realized that the last two weeks of study have brought me to the same conclusion of knowing these inner workings are going to take a lifetime of work and transformation.   This is working out my salvation.    And, to be completely honest, although I do long for Christ’s return, I find myself not rapture ready.  Yes, it will be a relief to be released of the responsibilities of this world, but I guess I am glad that Christ’s patience (in returning) is my salvation. 

I couldn’t help but connect that the verses that DJ calls, “The National Anthem of Heaven” (Philippians 2: 5-7), is written right smack dab on the cover of our Staff Behavior section in the Ultra Packet.

“Who because he was in the form of God….taking the form of a servant and being found in human likeness, he humbled himself….even to death on a cross.”

Darrell comments, “The pattern of servanthood; for there is no other pattern that helps human beings really live.  There is no other pattern that makes the human species really work, but servanthood.  It’s what the life of heaven is all about -- self-emptying love… the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit in this eternal joy of self-emptying pattern of servant love.”

I am so thankful to Sonshine for its focus on training all of us up in the way of self-giving, sacrificial, servant love.   As our Ultra Packet says, “To crave abundance is to crave Jesus.  To crave Jesus is to serve like Jesus.”

De-cluttering

If the future is dominated by the coming again of Jesus, there's little room left on the screen for projecting our anxieties and fantasies.  It takes the clutter out of our lives!!! 

I was on a walk listening to this sermon when DJ got to this part. Oh my gosh how much of my brain has been cluttered by the future, my anxieties and my fantasies!! I paused the sermon and just prayed for a de-cluttering, for a confidence in the fact that Jesus is coming, even now! Reminds me of Discipleship on the Edge - Jesus, the Alpha and Omega, is coming! The end has already happened because everything I am, have been or will be is in Christ. This frees me up to be totally taken by the present moment, to be romanced back onto my knees in self-giving-sacrificial-love (I feel you Ben, how quickly we reject it!!) I don't have to fear what comes next because I know how it ends. I just have to respond to that end now. The question is not if we will worship, but who we will worship. Babylon v. Holy City, Lamb v. Beast. 

Anywho, just some thoughts I had this week. I also just wanted to give you all a quick life update - I got a job!!!! Or rather, Christ gave me a job!!!!! The day after I listened to this sermon no less haha! I'm working as a server/hostess/bartender (what) at a taqueria (so I get to use spanish) walking distance from my house (so I can get there!) 

Honestly, His plan is always so much greater. Just wanted to share that little praise with you guys!! Can't wait to see you in a few short weeks!

True and Native Land

When DJ said that the enemies of the cross "slowly came to live without radical dependence on Christ," response time came to mind. It seemed like almost every week when a camper would come up to me or another staff member and talk about how they don't know how they got to this point in their lives or confess a long list of sins, struggles, hardships, lost thoughts which they have carried for so long. Satan is deceptive. He has come only to steal, kill, and destroy. He wants to go unnoticed, slowly causing compromise after compromise until a life feels compromised, accepting standards that are lower and feeling the weight of feeling lost.

But that is why there is only One Way. He, He is our true and native land. He is our home! It is not just life with Jesus; we live life IN Jesus. Oh the blessed preposition. In Jesus we are found in truth. In Jesus we have fullness of joy. In Jesus we have the love of the Father. The only hope that will never change is that which we place in Jesus and his return. It is on those Wednesday or Thursday nights when I especially found myself longing for him to come and make all things right again.

Father, would you help us to continue to look for your Shepherd staff and listen for your voice as we follow you. Help us to be aware of the natural tendencies of ourselves to deny our need for dependence on you and instead embrace the nature of relationships with our brothers and sisters and pattern of inherent servanthood that you have given us. Teach us to stoop lower. May our knees become weary of not just bowing before you, but let us do so together. Jesus, teach us to put out hope only in you and Spirit, create in us the longing of expectation found daily in patiently waiting for you to move and return. 

Our True Home & Life Beyond Christ

For our citizenship is in heaven...

This week's message brought to me the question: What informs my life?  Does my life reflect the values, goals, priorities, longings and desires of the Gospel-polis?  Do I know my primary citizenship as a faithful citizen of my true home?

DJ says that the evidence for living IN the Gospel-polis is that we treat one another differently.  As I reflect on this past week I see a lot of clutter and a lot of living in the polis of Ben.  DJ finishes the sermon through repeating this statement: If the future is dominated by the coming again of Jesus, there's little room left on the screen for projecting our anxieties and fantasies.  It takes the clutter out of our lives!!!  However uncomfortable I think the clutter that has been occupying my mind clearly reflects that I am not intentionally inviting Christ in, nor am fully seeking to be found in Christ, nor am I partaking in his paradoxically overwhelmingly filling self-emptying love.  I think back to the end of each summer and asking why does life not feel the same away from houseboats...  because I slowly succumb to the pressures and I take my eyes off the cross as I reject stooping lower to give of myself in serving.

Lord, please don't let us become enemies of the Cross of Christ!!  Give us your heart and mind to weep for those who slowly succumb to the pressures upon them, even as you give us the utmost clarity to not fool ourselves!!

How scary it is that I can become an enemy of the cross of Christ.  How scary it is that I think I can find a LIFE BEYOND CHRIST.  I would be the worst liar if I claimed that I thought I could make it without Christ.  Oh how many times have I come to a place where I lived without a RADICAL DEPENDENCE on Christ.

Lord, let us not forget where we live... let us not lose sight of our true home.

DJ (or rather, Jesus through DJ) continues to bring me to a place of greater understanding that I have forgotten where home is when I no longer eagerly wait for Jesus.  Do I have the trust to even wait 10 days?  When we do focus, with every fiber of our being (what a calling!), on Christ, we cannot help but to super-charge every moment with the hope that flows from Him.

Lord. Lead us to the cross, to the place where Jesus was crucified for me.  Lead me to that place even as I struggle, kicking and screaming, with all my being that still clings on the polis that is not of Christ.  Lead me to the cross, break me down to my knees and force my face to look upon your eyes, mixed with passion, justice, and love and burning with pure fire.  Even as I try to shut my eyes, Lord, bring my to the cross that I may blindly stumble upon that wooden splinter-filled hope of true life.  Lord help us live our lives worthy of the high calling of being faithful citizens of our true home.

Radical Definition and Dependence in Christ

I've been reading the book Abba's Child by Brennan Manning. While listening to the sermon this week, I was reminded of something he said in the book, "Define yourself radically as one beloved by God. This is the true self. Every other identity is illusion."

Living in the Land Called Gospel means radically defining myself as one loved by God, and one truly belonging to the Colony of Heaven. I love the idea of radical definition in Christ, but it is so hard to embrace because I am constantly tempted by earthly things.

After listening to the sermon this week and reading Abba's Child, I started to pay attention to my thoughts while I was around friends and family. Constantly I was asking myself, am I defining myself by my interactions with people? By earthly things? By what people think of me (which is just what I think people think of me and is hardly ever true)? In order to run away from the temptation of getting caught up in earthly things, I had to continuously remind myself that I am a child of God, I am the beloved, I am a true citizen of heaven. Seriously, these phrases rung around in my head all week.

I become an enemy of the cross when I don't embrace, as DJ says, radical dependence on Christ. When I instead depend on earthly things, I lose my way.

Jesus, help me to recognize my true definition and dependence in you.

If Citizenship in the Land Called Sonshine is accepted.........

WARNING:  This post contains adult content, adult language, and a little psychological nudity!

This post is about the disconnect between.... ideas and reality.  This post may be hard to follow as I jump between the dimensions of ideas and the Land Called Gospel/Sonshine.  

This week's sermon constantly reminded me of interviews and the process in which one becomes a citizen of Sonshine.  I interview on average (this year Lara is driving that average down) about 1-2 people a week leading up to summer.  The majority of them fail the citizenship test and never experience Sonshine's  "land of the Ski and the home of the Shave".  The criteria required to be a citizen in Land Called Sonshine is "too much" for them.  They simply cannot pledge allegiance to the staff culture of self-giving-sacrificial-servant-love!          

When I explain what this land looks, sounds, and feels like, I have yet to have a potential citizen say, "NO THANKS!".  My speech sounds something like this......

As a Citizen of Sonshine you will be a part of a very unique population within a very unique Polis. Citizens reside in 4 different Polis'. Team Barnabas, Trainee, Driver, and Admin. Each Polis plays a unique and decisive role each week to make the Land of Sonshine come alive!!!  The common ground between each Polis is found in Philippians 2:3-5.  "Do nothing from selfishness or empty self-importance, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interest of others. Have this attitude in yourself which was also in Christ Jesus."  This attitude of self-giving-sacrificial-servant-love is experienced as a citizen of Sonshine through serving youth leaders, campers, and fellow Sonshine Citizens. 

If Citizenship in the Land Called Sonshine is accepted;

a.) Do we have your permission to encourage you to embrace the discomfort of humbly serving others?  Desirable Response:  YES

What does that mean to you to embrace the discomfort of humbly serving others?

b.) Do we have your permission to train you in the attitude of self-giving-sacrificial-servant-love?
Desirable Response:  YES

What does it mean to you to have an attitude of self-giving-sacrificial-servant-love ?

c.) Do we have your permission to correct behavior that is inconsistent with the humility of Christ?
Desirable Response:  YES -

What does it mean to you to have behavior that is inconsistent with the humility of Christ?


The idea of a such a land existing in this time and space tempts them/us to apply for citizenship. Then the brass-tacks of the Land Called Sonshine mule kicks them/us in the splankna leaving a decision to be made.

I look forward to reading the names on week 1's citizenship roster...aka Travel plans!

 

The Enchanting, Intriguing, Electrifyingly Wondrous realm known to DJ as “The Land Called Gospel"......Known To Us as HOUSEBOATS!!!!

This week I read through and edited and re-edited the 2017 Super Ultra Packet and Devo Guide.  With my self-imposed immersion into the culture of Christ’s gospel lived out on houseboats, I found my “drenched in ultra packet and devo” mind and heart connecting with these two thoughts in the sermon:

Thought # 1 -  The gospel of Jesus Christ creates a new polis. A new culture, kingdom, life, & empire.  We are citizens of the gospel polis and Jesus Christ call us to primarily His gospel culture.

Thought # 2 – Paul exhorts me to radical focus on Christ where every fiber of my being is seeking to know Christ and be found in Christ and  every fiber of my being longs for understanding and living the mind of Christ.  DJ uses  Philippians 2:5-11 as a passage that expresses the mind of Christ and refers to it as the national anthem of Heaven.  He uses this passage to conclude that the pattern I am called to follow is the pattern of servanthood.   DJ proclaims that there is no other pattern that helps human beings live.  No other pattern but servanthood.   He then portrays heaven as being about self-serving love and the eternal joy of self-emptying love!

These two thoughts for me capture the mind of Christ and the unifying mind/heart of us as we seek to live out His kingdom come on the water! 

A few quotes from the Super Ultra Packet that resonated with me as having a tie to the theme of this sermon are as follows:

“The love of God which forgives sin, envelopes shame, and inspires self-sacrifice emits not from prayer alarms, big goals, and impressive promises.  Instead, God’s unique love to us and through us erupts from that most simple moment where we behold the definitive manner of LOVE the Father has given to us. “

“You want to be a great leader?  Commit yourself to being slaughtered on behalf of your team so that they might live.   Heart of sacrifice = strong leadership. “

“Loving others involves giving myself away in self-giving-sacrificial-servant-love.”

This sermon and this series in many ways provides some terrific theological and biblical depth to the definition we use for the term relational ministry.  In the Ultra Packet we present the definition to relational ministry this way:

RELATIONAL MINISTRY

Sonshine Specialized Camping Ministries is a relational ministry. What we mean by "relational" is that we are developing relationships with students in order to:

I.   Befriend others with the love of Christ

II.  Help encourage Christ-like identity

III. Model a Christ-centered lifestyle

IV.  Invite them to deeper intimacy with Christ

Houseboat ministry is very unique. It really can’t be explained, only experienced. The reason for the ministry is simply to provide an atmosphere where Christ is Lord and people are invited to grow in Christ and in their interpersonal relationships.

For me, some of life’s most superlatively richest moments are rooted in this opportunity we have to invite students and staff to the enchanting, intriguing, electrifyingly wondrous realm known to DJ as “The Land Called Gospel.” 

Jesus is our True Home

Living as Citizens in a Land Called Gospel….with dual citizenship on this Earth. We must not forget our true home!

This morning I talked with my roommate (thank you snow day!) about DJ’s sermon this week and she connected the verses from Philippians to Hebrews 11:

“These (referring to those who have lived in faith, i.e. Abraham, Sarah, Abel, Noah, etc.) all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth…But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one” (vs.13 and 16)

Throughout DJ’s sermon, I was struck by how the hope of the coming of our Savior informs so much of our life. Because of our citizenship in heaven, “we await a Savior who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.” As the hope of the coming of Christ DOMINATES our future, there is NO ROOM left for our anxieties regarding the future.

I am discouraged by the hopeLESSness of some of my professors and peers in the face of this political climate. This sermon has helped me to understand the patterns that I am seeing around me: as Christians, we have dual citizenship…some perform their duties faithfully in hope of the coming of Christ, while others set their eyes on earthly things. One gives way to hope, the other to hopelessness.

Man. READ YOUR BIBLES, PEOPLE! Reid, that has been ringing in my head constantly. I do not like the tension of dual citizenship, but it acts as a warning for me, for us, not to become enemies of the cross. Paul and DJ’s warning rings true in my ears – it is so EASY to become an enemy of the cross. We let our minds slip to earthly things and we find that we have forsaken our duties in fear. Lord, correct me when I forget my true home! Even if it hurts and I don’t welcome the correction, do not let me become an enemy of the cross!

I am so thankful for you all for modelling a Christ-centered life to me!

Mirm 

"Follow me as I follow Christ" -Paul

During summer, we live in a colony of heaven on houseboats. We get to enjoy the full rights of citizenship in heaven right now!! DJ says we get the glorious responsibility to live in such a way that those also living on houseboats may come to realize that Jesus Christ really is alive and well. He mentions four ways we can better live our primary citizenship. One of the ways is to embrace the pattern inherent in any true colony of heaven. Paul is saying FOLLOW ME AS I FOLLOW CHRIST! (also 1 Corinthians 11:1) This is something I have been pushed in frequently on Admin - Reid often says “follow me as I follow Christ”. DJ clarifies that it’s not in a prideful or cocky way, rather simply modeling what it looks like to follow Jesus.

We befriend, encourage, model, and invite campers/staff to Jesus because we get to use this to show them how to be a citizen of heaven on houseboats (and in the rest of life) and see how Jesus is real and alive and well. We embrace the pattern inherent in any true quality of heaven and then lead by example. We say to other members of Admin... Follow me as I follow Christ. We show Drivers, follow us as we follow Christ. Drivers invite barneys into that... and campers... follow us as we follow Christ. May we seek to live the mind of Christ in all things so that we develop an inherent pattern of servanthood.

Singular

“All I finally want is Christ.”  

Boom.  Mic drop.  How simple, how singular, how….free.  If I could always be of that singular mindset and heart-set, my life would be completely different.  In my overly articulated, exceedingly verbal life, all I want to say is, “All I finally want is Christ.”

But I don’t just say that.  I, like yet another wedding invitation inquiry, always want to bring along a “Plus One.”  Christ + good work, Christ + plans, Christ + future, Christ + what about?, Christ + doubt, Christ + sleep, Christ + financial security, Christ + entertainment, Christ + busyness, Christ + ______ ."  Why do I always add a Plus One?  And the scary thing is that Paul refers to those that add the + to their lives as the troublemakers and dogs.  I am the troublemaker and, ipso-facto, I am the dog.  Forget about “being aware of these people who want you to add to Jesus and His finished work,” as Darrell says.  I AM “these people”.  I need to be aware of myself!

I do not want to add any plus to the death and resurrection of Chris and turn the Gospel on its head and drain myself (or others) of the joy of the Lord.   This is my deep, deep prayer, that I would desire, above all else, Christ plus NOTHING!!!”  Help me, Lord.

I know this will take a lifetime.  This is what it looks like for me to work out my faith.  And, as Darrell says, "Jesus knows we will not put our full confidence in Him unless and until that deeply rooted desire to live independently of Him is crucified and buried.  So in His love he takes us through experiences that crucifies the flesh.  The more the flesh dies the more we are able to live in that resurrection life.”

As hard as it is to say that I want Christ to continue to take me through life experiences that crucify my flesh, it is necessary and the only way to get me to the singular Christ, not Christ + ____.”    

Sermon 5

Sheesh DJ. I feel like I listened to this sermon 100 times and still could write a novel about it/still don't feel 'processed' enough to post. Main things that have stuck in my brain:

- Christ plus anything, however honorable, robs us of joy in Him. I echo you, Paulina!!! My 'good intentions', good works, fruitful bible studies etc rob me of true joy in Him because it's a substitute for being IN Him.

- "Flesh" is life lived in my own power and wisdom. Ugh this is the anthem of my life right now!!! It seems like thoughts & conversations about my own power (trying to get a job, complaining about lack of resources/opportunities) and my own wisdom (what do I want to do, what will others approve of) control every aspect of my day. What a foolish thing to spend brain power on. My own power and wisdom is Weak with a capital W. Lord, would you blind me to myself by making me new and helping me see where I am truly found - in You!

- When did Jesus become more than a name to me? I immediately flashed back to my first and second summers on the water. He became so alive, so divinely close and 'human' to me. Yet I still struggle with a sense of detachment when I'm here. It must be because I'm adding something.

Christ + Nothing!!
I pray that He would continue killing the pluses for all of us. Miss you guys- can't believe it's already been a week!

All I Finally Want...

Holy buckets.  Where to even begin this week??

First, I have been super encouraged, and quite challenged, reading all of your posts this week.

Here are a handful of highlights from my time listening to DJ this week:

1. Watch out for all those joy robbers out there!!  
Ha!  I pray that God would bless us with open eyes and clarity of vision to see every time we add something to Jesus and the cross.  I pray for the sensitivity to understand that I am the joy robber!  Every time I add anything, though especially works, to the Gospel I ruin it for my life.  I like what DJ had to add in the closing remarks about C.S. Lewis's message: My desires are not too strong, but far too weak.  I am a half-hearted creature fooling around with sex, and drink, and ambition when INFINITE JOY is offered us.  I am far too easily pleased.  Lord, help us to not settle for anything less than your infinite Joy, give us the strength to follow Paul in proclaiming that all I finally want is Christ.

2. I put no confidence in the flesh...
"Unless we too admit this we will not know the fullness of joy.  All of our achievements do not justify us before God!"  This is the something that ruins the Gospel of Jesus: I can qualify myself.

"...and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light." Colossians 1:12


... but rather boast in knowing and understanding Christ Jesus.

3. When did Jesus Christ become more than a name to me?  Has he?
Do I allow myself to be found in Him?  Am I able to swallow the truth I cannot find Christ?  Will I be humble and wise enough in his  knowledge to realize that I am not the subject, but rather part of Christ's story. 
Do I know Him who draws me close in the knowledge of Him and in the fellowship of His sufferings?   "Jesus knows that we will not put our full confidence in Him unless and until that deeply rooted desire to live independently of Him is crucified and buried.

And finally, I was challenged by the exhortation by DJ to reconsider those song lyrics that we can joyfully sing... Oh the wonderful cross... that bids me come and die and see that I could truly live.  Thank Jesus for leading us into situations beyond ourselves so that we may discover Himself.

“BUT WARS” -- Emasculating the Devastating “BUT” with Christ’s CONJUNCTIVE work in us and through us on the Water

“BUT WARS” -- Emasculating the Devastating “BUT” with Christ’s CONJUNCTIVE work in us and through  us on the Water

In this post I simply took DJ’s six statements of faith and then tied/connected/CONJUNCTIVIZED each statement to a sentence or paragraph from our Sonshine Devotional Guide.  

Our summer experiences over the years have for me effectively highlighted the necessity of spiritual arithmetic to be simply CHRIST + NOTHING as opposed to CHRIST + (BUT one more thing) – AKA (per DJ) – 'The Devastating “But.”'

SIX STATEMENTS OF FAITH

1 – DJ - 1 – I put no confidence in the flesh.  I put no confidence in my ability to make myself right with God.

Sonshine Paraphrase - Our legacy as children of Adam is to flee from our creator.  We flee mercy because mercy pierces our facades of self-promotion, self-control, and power.  Like the crippled man at the pool of Bethesda.  We are spiritually crippled and perhaps want to stay spiritually crippled.   We are spiritual invalids.  While we are huddled in a crippled heap, Jesus, “the one who saves” walks into our garden and says to our invalid souls, “do you want to get well?”  It takes profound discipline and humility to confess that we didn’t discover mercy but the mercy has discovered us and said to our helpless souls “rise, get up, take up your mat and walk.”

2 – DJ - I boast in Christ Jesus.  Boast in what Jesus has done.  Focus needs to get off of us and on to Christ.  Depend on Jesus and His effort to make me holy.

Sonshine Paraphrase - Whole hearted celebration and fulfillment stems from the discipline of internalizing Christ's presence and allowing Him to define an individual's effort and group's corporate effort.

3 – DJ - Actually knowing him makes all the difference in the world. 

Sonshine Paraphrase - Working shoulder by shoulder in a team effort while prying beneath the facades of fashion and etiquette through mentoring is an amazing one-two combination punch into hearing and seeing God's person. For in teamwork and mentoring God's extraordinary testimony is expressed in the perfectly unique form of each team member, mentor, and mentoree.  Ultimately God's dreams are not fake dreams, they are the very heart of everything that's genuine and true. And when you commune with Jesus and ingest His presence, His word, you are the living expression of all things true and real. You are the living expression of Christ.  So cheers to the left-brained-right brained, male-female, introverted-extroverted, logical-emotional, conservative-liberal, law-prophets witnesses that make up this team.  I listed these one-two combinations because all these one-two combinations highlight the unique witness that God has made each one of you to be. The one-two combinations remind me that each and every moment of our time serving together is packed with potential to see God's incredible, too good to be true (thus dreamy) heart in the countenances and words that we share in our work together.  The way that God's word reveals itself with such diversity among His people blows my mind. His creative capacity is beyond (for me at least) imagination and thus dream like -- but its real.  His creative capacity expressed through you is truth. Jesus is the truth and He is speaking and living truth before us right now as we serve each other and the students on houseboats.

In short, can I dream up such a God? Of course not, but your unique witness establishes in me the reality of that dream. Your unique witness reveals Christ in you the Hope of Glory and it is stunningly beautiful.

4 – DJ - That I may found in Him.  IN Him.  Final stress falls on union with Christ. Life with fellowship in Christ.  FOUND IN HIM! FOUND IN CHRIST!  Where else would you want to be found but IN CHRIST?!? We don’t find Christ. Christ finds us!

Sonshine Paraphrase (Note – this is from Staff Culture, not Devo) – God is NEW every morning. Baptize your day in “newness.” Lay claim to God’s promise that He will make all things new in you and through you, no matter what your activity, today, and every day.

5 – DJ - God in His love leads us into situations beyond ourselves so that we die to confidence in ourselves and He resurrects our confidence in Him thereby meeting the deepest desires of our hearts. 

Sonshine Paraphrase – “Jesus gained the attention of the moral elite, like Paul or the folks in the temple, by violent confrontation.  If Jesus stoops to serve you, thank Him.  If Jesus violently confront you, thank Him.  Whether served or beaten you are having the Kingdom of God wrestled into you and for that, you rejoice.”

6 – DJ - I press on to lay hold for that which Christ Jesus laid hold of me.

Sonshine Paraphrase – “God has consigned creation to futility and decay to constantly bid all creation to surrender their prison of death to His prison of love.  Solomon says that God has hardwired “eternity” into our hearts.   Through the cross, our pretty but fading cut flowers of date nights, passionate worship, joy-filled celebrations, are grafted into the eternal root of Jesse.  Through His root, dead flowers become eternally sustained.  Our moments are not fleeting. Our moments are not empty but instead pregnant with Christ, the Logos, the eternal meaning that floods our dead hearts and dead moments with faith, hope, and love which remain. . . eternally.”